When most people think of Lady Gaga, images of outlandish and fashion forward outfits (remember the meat dress? Of course you do...), flashy performances, and high heel shoes that could kill a man probably come to mind. But when I think of Lady Gaga I view her as much more. To me, she is my Italian goddess role model, an empath with a bleeding heart, and as revealed in her 2017 documentary, Gaga: Five Foot Two, a  sufferer of chronic pain and fibromyalgia.

Over the past few years, Lady Gaga has adopted a no-holds-barred attitude toward being her most authentic self in all realms of life. In my opinion, Five Foot Two is a perfect example of letting people in to see what her life is truly like, which includes the struggles of living with and managing chronic pain.

Naturally, I anxiously anticipated the release of Gaga's documentary - I have loved and listened to her music over the years and connect with her love for family and Italian heritage. As I watched the documentary, I found myself resonating with nearly everything that was in it, but I was especially glued to the screen when chronic pain was the subject. I found these moments raw, honest, moving, and sometimes painful, as I unfortunately know life with chronic pain all too well.

What Life Looks Like With Chronic Pain

Earlier on in 5 Foot 2, Gaga is laying down on a couch as a flare up starts. She asks for a washcloth and says the following:

"It's the whole right side of my body. It's in a... I don't know, a spasm. It feels like there's a rope pulling from my, like, first toe all up my leg into my... and then... around my first rib... into my shoulder. And then, my neck. And head, jaw. My fucking face hurts."

This describes exactly what it feels like when I am going through a flare up: it's on my entire right side, I can't necessarily put the feeling to words, and everything hurts. It hurts to move any part of my body, it hurts to sit still, and ultimately, it hurts to exist in those moments.

As the scene progresses, Gaga talks about how her privilege and wealth plays a role (that's my empath queen for you though <3), something that's far too often ignored by the able-bodied community when thinking about effective and consistent treatment for chronic pain:

"I just think about other people that, like, have maybe something like this, that are struggling to figure out what it is, and they don't have the quick money to have somebody help them. Like I don't know what I'd fucking do if I didn't have everybody here to help me. What the hell would I do?"

And while I'm certainly nowhere near as wealthy as Lady Gaga, I am able to work full time, I do have great health insurance, and I am able to afford treatment for some of my conditions. Yet, I wonder how much better I would feel if I could afford to do all the things I know will help, such as acupuncture, going to the chiropractor, getting regular massages, and seeking out other holistic treatments.

The Effects Of Chronic Pain Go Far Beyond Physical Symptoms

​What typically happens with many of us spoonies during or after a flare subsides is the feeling of embarrassment, remorse, or shame for looking and feeling weak. Lady Gaga ends up vocalizing this mindset during the aforementioned scene:

"Do I look pathetic? I'm so embarrassed. And I don't even know, like, what a childbirth will be like. Or if I can. I know I think I can get pregnant. I just don't know, like, what are my hips going to do? I don't fucking know."

The last part of her statement also highlights how debilitating chronic pain can be as she questions whether her body will betray her during childbirth. For me, I question whether my body is going to let me go for a long bike ride without "punishing" me for a few days afterward or if I'll be able to bust all the moves on the dance floor during a night out and feel okay the next day.

​I've had to abandon a lot of my former hobbies (e.g., boxing, weight lifting, MMA classes) due to my chronic pain, and while I've found different ways to move my body and exercise, the void is still there and I too sometimes feel pathetic and embarrassed for not being able to use my body like I used to.

Although I do not have children, nor do I ever plan on having any (more on that in a later post), I know plenty of my readers are parents, work with children in some capacity, or plan on having children some day. Also, while I may have a myriad of symptoms from my chronic illnesses, thankfully, I've been spared of migraines thus far. As such, this means I'm not the most informed about living with migraines or treating them, but I know how debilitating and horrible they can be for those who get them.

As such, I present to you a guest post from a medical practitioner who specializes in headaches and migraines in children. Please read on for more information and for a helpful presentation included at the end of the post.

Note: I was not paid or compensated for sharing this information - I just want to help as many people as I can with my platform/this website and arm my readers with information. I'll also note that no matter what medical advice you come across, regardless of who it's from, it's up to you to use a critical eye when reading to determine if the information resonates with you (e.g., I don't tolerate pharmaceuticals, so whenever someone suggests them to me I know to kindly decline and search for other options).

Parents are always on the lookout for any signs that their children might be suffering, and for good reason. A strong component of the parenting instinct is to want to protect our kids from anything that might be hurting them. Unfortunately, there are some ailments that don’t come with obvious signs parents can see. In the case of migraine headaches, for example, identifying whether or not your child suffers from them is more difficult than using a thermometer to diagnose a fever.
 
What makes it more difficult is the fact that young children often don’t have the language to explain their symptoms. That means a child may be experiencing intense migraine pain without parents being able to do anything about it or know when to seek treatment. When it comes to migraine headaches, it’s up to parents to be detectives, looking for clues to their kids’ symptoms and understanding when to schedule a doctor’s appointment. Getting treatment for potential migraine headaches as soon as possible can help alleviate the pain for kids and make life that much easier for them.
 
For example, parents should be on the lookout for signs of nasal congestion, swollen foreheads, or if one eye looks puffy or swollen. When seen in conjunction with a severe headache, these may be signs of cluster headaches — intense episodes of pain that recur over the course of weeks or even months. Severe abdominal pain accompanied by vomiting or nausea may be indicators of abdominal migraine, which can be a warning sign that the child may be likely to develop migraine headaches later in life.

These and other signs of various types of migraine headaches should spur parents to visit their children’s pediatrician or a headache specialist as soon as possible. Children are 50 percent more likely to develop migraine headaches if their parents have them, so you may already know your kids’ risk of developing migraines. The following guide details many of the most common types of migraine headaches and how they affect children. Parents never want to see their children suffer, but this guide can help you understand what you’re seeing and get your kids the care they need.

As I’ve shared before, my health started to plummet in 2012. Even though I didn’t have any formal diagnoses until a year or so later (Hashimoto’s, and then Lyme disease in 2016), the doctor that I first started working with noted that I had to change my diet to get better. We came up with a game plan to remove gluten from my diet to see if I would feel better, and I did, but little did I know that gluten would be one of many things that would be taken off the table – literally – over the next few years.

Thankfully, I continued to work with intelligent and forward-thinking doctors who recognize that for many individuals with chronic illnesses and gut issues like myself that we *have* to clean up our diet to heal. For me, so many food items either cause inflammation, which further exacerbates autoimmune responses in my body, or I cannot properly digest food, which in turn causes discomfort and pain.

While it might sound simple enough to just remove a certain food from one’s diet, it was challenging. I remember sitting in front of the TV at night with a bowl of ice cream and pounding a sleeve of Oreos (that could also be attributed to the anti-depressants I was on that gave me a Michael Phelps-inspired appetite haha). I especially struggled to stop eating comfort foods during times of stress. Long story short, it wasn’t easy for me to get to where I am today with my diet, but I learned a lot along the way.

Although I could sit here today with my *very* limited diet of select vegetables and a handful of other food (sunflower butter = my saving grace for calories) and throw a pity party for myself every day because I can no longer eat my dad’s meatballs and sauce or chocolate peanut butter ice cream, I realized that my relationship with food has changed throughout this healing process, and for the better.
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So, for all my other spoonies out there who are sad over having to give up their favorite foods just like I was, this list is for you. And even if you don’t have a chronic illness, this list might inspire you to change your relationship with food – you never know!

Becoming One With Cooking/Preparing Food
Over time, and as I’ve removed more and more things from my diet, fast food and even eating out at healthier restaurants is a big no-no for me because of my bubble girl ways. As such, I prepare and cook all of my food (except for when one of my lovely parents helps me out!). While I knew how to cook before, I’ve learned a lot more about cooking and preparing food that I might not have otherwise. From bacon-wrapped dates to chicken chile avocado cups, I’ve experimented with some pretty cool recipes that have taught me a lot about cooking - watch out, Master Chef... I'm coming for ya!

Grocery Store Discoveries
I know that nowadays people advise to focus on snagging food items on the borders/outside of the grocery store where the produce is located, and I couldn’t agree more! When I first started this journey, I had no idea where most of the food I was supposed to buy were located, as I used to mostly eat gluten, processed and packaged foods, and frozen meals. Now, I feel like I’m a grocery store pro :)

Trying New Foods
One of the diets that I tried for a while was the autoimmune paleo diet. There are so many amazing recipes out there, and I couldn’t wait to try as many as I could. Naturally, trying new recipes brought about trying new foods. For instance, if you had told me five years ago that I would be eating acorn squash on the regular I would have thought you were talking about squirrel food. I’ve tried tons of different produce items and cool ways to rework traditional recipes (like using frozen bananas to make ice cream!), and aside from the nastiness that is raw rhubarb, I’ve loved it all!

No Choice But To Eat Healthier
I think this one speaks for itself, but considering I was given the choice of either be inflamed, bloated, gassy, in pain, and ave cystic acne all over my face or eat a more balanced and better diet, I chose the latter. Most people ask me how I do it and applaud me for being more conscious about what I put on my plate, but when it comes down to it, I really didn’t have a choice if I wanted to be feel better.

Overcoming Emotional Eating
When you can only eat vegetables and a handful of other food items, the temptation to use food as a crutch in times of stress or happiness or whatever other emotion you’re feeling is less likely. While I still can pound a whole lotta sunflower butter when things are really rough and I need to “reward” myself, I have a much better control on emotional eating than I used to. In return, my relationship with food has changed for the better.

Eating to Sustain
Speaking of my relationship with food, I mainly view it as a way to fuel and nourish my body each and every day. Instead of using it as a reward or a punishment, I mainly view food as a way to keep my body alive and thriving. This is not to say that I hate the food on my plate, but I don’t have an addiction to certain foods anymore (looking at YOU, cheese <3) and I recognize that as a country, we have a very gluttonous and unhealthy relationship with food. Do I miss wolfing down an entire order of mozzarella sticks and chicken wings? Sure. But I can tell you I don’t miss the hold food used to have on me.

I Literally Wouldn’t Be Healthy Otherwise
I understand that everyone’s dietary situation is different, nor are everyone’s conditions as serious as mine are. But for me, I would not be functioning if I didn’t remove things from my diet and change my relationship with food. As frustrating as it used to be to not be able to eat the office birthday cake or pay a visit to my long, lost love Taco Bell, it would never, ever be worth the residual effects to me.

​While I have a ways to go with adding things like fruits and other vegetables back into my diet, what I’m eating now resonates with me and doesn’t cause my body to go into attack mode every time I eat. For that, I am extremely thankful.
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Have you struggled with changing up your diet or removing your favorite foods out of your arsenal? Has your illness changed your relationship with food? I’d love to hear your thoughts!